First of all, I'm wearing form fitting clothes. I used to always wear baggie shirts that covered my lack of waist, and my horrible rib hump that I swore the whole world could see. I have been enjoying going out and buying size small shirts and am thrilled with how well they fit. Oh, and I've even thrown about 6 racer back tank tops into my wardrobe. I used to not be able to wear those at all. I looked so off balance in them, and they would always try to wrap around one side of my body. I just feel so "normal" now in my clothes, and it has definitely helped with my confidence. If I catch someone looking at me, I actually feel worthy of the stare. Its a pretty special feeling.
All of my sticky tape has finally fallen off, but not until last week, and to be totally honest, I may have encouraged about 6 of them to come off. It was actually quite gross that last week because they were starting to travel around my back, I assume from getting wet in the shower, then re-drying and sticking elsewhere. I would also find those darn things on the inside of my clothes on a daily basis for about a week. I am so grateful that I didn't have to have any stitches removed, and especially happy that my surgeon uses these stitches, and not staples as I've seen on many others. Here is my scar:
Its not straight, but quite frankly I love it. Looks hardcore, and will forever give me a wonderful story to tell. The additional lines you see on my back are from laying on my shirt. They kind of look like scars. :)
Speaking of stories, since I've had the surgery, I notice I am a lot more open about my scoliosis. I'll talk to anyone about it that's willing to listen. Even the guy sitting next to me at the sushi bar. I notice though, that the more I talk about it, the more I hear about everyone else's scoliosis. Scoliosis was always my secret. Something I never shared with ANYONE. I didn't want to be different, I didn't want to complain. If you knew me, you probably didn't ever know I had anything "wrong" with me. I essentially suffered in silence. You know, sometimes the pain would get so bad that the only way to relieve it would be to lay on a tennis ball. I would roll on it with all of my body weight to get the pain out. My husband doesn't even know this. I NEVER complained. So, like I was saying, the more I talk about it, the more I realize how many people this afflicts. Even the guy sitting next to me at the sushi bar. A couple of days ago, I was at the park, and Lyla (age 2) was repeatedly asking me to push her on the swing. I kept telling her that I couldn't because of my back. A lady overheard and gave me the 'Your back? I want to know what's wrong with your back, but I'm not going to ask' look. I divulged my surgery information to her, and next thing I know she's pushing Lyla and she's talking about her rib hump. I was ecstatic!!
I have NO pain. Not even just a little tiny bit that isn't even worth mentioning, no. I have NO pain! All of the pain I had prior to surgery is gone. I can stand without pain, I can sit without pain, I can drive without pain, I can sleep without pain. Those rods and screws are a part of me now, they belong in my body, and they are as apparent to me as my liver. And who can feel their liver? This is nothing short of a miracle, and borderline unheard of with this surgery. I can go all day long without laying down and I can fully take care of my kids by myself. I can even pitch a ball to Drew, and play soccer with him. I follow the scoliosis forums closely, too closely maybe, and the amount of time that people suffer after this surgery is so disheartening to read about. I think about them daily, and am so grateful for the outcome I have had and the magical hands of the surgeon that "fixed" me.
One thing I have noticed since my surgery, and I don't really know what to accredit this to, but I feel its worth mentioning. I have always been a type-A personality, and my blood pressure teeters on the high side because I am so high strung. A normal blood pressure for me would be 125/75, but easily goes way up throughout the day due to outside stressors. I would say the above mentioned blood pressure would have been my low. Well, I have been checking my blood pressure almost daily now because I've noted that its new normal is 97/62. Over and over again. This has me so perplexed and intrigued. Could this be due to my surgery or something else all together. Dr. Marco, if you read this, enlighten me!! Also note, that I am not taking anything for pain so its not narcotic induced. Not that I even know if narcotics cause that to happen, but I imagine they do.
One more tiny thing, which is really a big thing, I'm driving! I've been driving. I started driving on my 4 week post op day. I am super independent and the not being able to get up and go was really getting to me. I think that's part of the reason I ditched the pain pills so quickly too, well that and the fact that I enjoy being on planet earth. On pain pills you kind of hover somewhere between here and the moon I'm convinced.
Tim, my husband, will be coming for a visit in a couple of weeks and we are so excited. Its been really hard on my kids and me to be away from Daddy. When Tim left I was only two weeks post op and was only just getting up and around. He's going to be in shock when he arrives at 8 weeks post op. I can't wait!!
Still walking and working out, and managed to shed 10 minutes off of my walking 5k. I walk a 5k in 45 minutes now, ok I lie, i was 46 minutes and some change, but close enough. I'm pretty sure that's about as fast as it can possibly be done. Don't believe me, I challenge you!
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