3.5 months out

Wow its been a long time.  February 6 will mark 4 months since surgery.  I can't believe its been so long already.  There were moments when time seemed to hold still, and most others that have just flashed by.  I have come so so so far in this short time that I spend less time thinking about my scoliosis now than I ever did before surgery.  It used to be an all consuming thing.   Constant correction of my uneven shoulders and making sure that my clothes didn't reveal too much of my "secret."  I've all but forgotten what that feels like and enjoy wearing clothes that hug me now.

The incision is getting less noticeable as expected, but the numbness is still very much there and I'm thinking may never go away.  It is a very strange sensation to touch my back or have someone else touch my back.  Feels like rubber, gross.  When I unclasp my bra I squeeze my shoulder blades together so that the bra strap moves away from my body before I unclasp it because I just cannot tolerate that numb sensation.  I have also been having a lot of itching on my back which I assume is due to the nerves still waking up.  There are two spots on my back that itch on a daily basis, I've kind of just learned to ignore it.  I haven't gotten brave enough to really feel around on my back to see what it feels like.  There is one spot up by my neck where the rod starts that I feel around on, this is also the spot that is most itchy, and it does feel a little bit different.  Not like a regular vertebrae would.  Needless to say, in these aspects, I am still getting used to my new back and all of the new bling I carry around.  Even though a vast majority of my back is numb to the touch, the inside is hyper-sensitive.  I can't handle any poking or patting on my back yet.  Sitting on hard backed chairs feels a little bit strange, not painful, just foreign.  Like I'm leaning against a bumpy piece of wood or something.  I went to a restaurant with Tim not long ago, and we sat in bar stools that had low backs to them.  If I leaned back in these chairs it caught right at the bottom of where the rod starts.. ouch!!  So uncomfortable.  I remained perfectly straight and at the edge of my seat the whole time.  Its still amazing to me how the human body can heal and adjust to new things.

I joined the gym again at 12 weeks post-op with a little bit of hesitation, but a lot of exitement and determination.  I had been working out just about everyday at home on the elliptical and with light weights, and I felt ready to tackle my group exercise classes I so enjoy.  I now do zumba and spin on an almost daily basis and continue to do weights.  It makes me so happy to be able to be a part of this again because it is such an important part of my life and I wasn't ready to give it up.  I got really big into exercising a couple of years ago.  It is something that you build an addiction to, and something I was so afraid would come to a screeching halt after surgery.  I think the fact that I enjoy being active so much and was not ready to give it up really helped me push through.

My kids have just about forgotten that I've had surgery and every now and then I still have to remind them to be careful with my back as they run at me at 100 mph.

Our time in Houston is coming to a close in 5 weeks.  I will have one more appointment with my surgeon before I leave and then I imagine I won't need another check up until my one year appointment. The kids and I are so excited to get back to our house and their toys and most importantly their Daddy.  We have really missed being our little family of four.  I will be eternally grateful to my parents for making this journey possible for me and for making my recovery as easy and comfortable as possible.  Love you guys.

I'll probably be posting when I get back home to Wyoming and settled, and then again at 6 months.  Thanks again for reading!

13.1 at 8 weeks post-op

Just a quick post.  I decided last week that I would celebrate my 8 week post op marker by walking a half-marathon today.  I did it!  My legs and feet were tired, but no back pain at all.

Tim gets into town next week for one full week.  We are so excited.

I have my next doctors appointment on December 21, so I'll definitely be updating then, maybe sooner.  Thanks for reading!


Untitled by alistephens at Garmin Connect - Details

Look what I did today!

Long walk 6weeks post op by alistephens at Garmin Connect - Details

6 weeks post-op

Hello!  I know its been a while.  I've been spending a lot of time thinking about the blog on a daily basis, but not having much to write about.  I can't believe its been six weeks already.  I feel like a totally new person.

First of all, I'm wearing form fitting clothes.  I used to always wear baggie shirts that covered my lack of waist, and my horrible rib hump that I swore the whole world could see.  I have been enjoying going out and buying size small shirts and am thrilled with how well they fit.  Oh, and I've even thrown about 6 racer back tank tops into my wardrobe.  I used to not be able to wear those at all.  I looked so off balance in them, and they would always try to wrap around one side of my body.   I just feel so "normal" now in my clothes, and it has definitely helped with my confidence.  If I catch someone looking at me, I actually feel worthy of the stare.  Its a pretty special feeling.

All of my sticky tape has finally fallen off, but not until last week, and to be totally honest, I may have encouraged about 6 of them to come off.  It was actually quite gross that last week because they were starting to travel around my back, I assume from getting wet in the shower, then re-drying and sticking elsewhere.  I would also find those darn things on the inside of my clothes on a daily basis for about a week.  I am so grateful that I didn't have to have any stitches removed, and especially happy that my surgeon uses these stitches, and not staples as I've seen on many others. Here is my scar:

Its not straight, but quite frankly I love it.  Looks hardcore, and will forever give me a wonderful story to tell.  The additional lines you see on my back are from laying on my shirt.  They kind of look like scars.  :)

Speaking of stories, since I've had the surgery, I notice I am a lot more open about my scoliosis.  I'll talk to anyone about it that's willing to listen.  Even the guy sitting next to me at the sushi bar.  I notice though, that the more I talk about it, the more I hear about everyone else's scoliosis.  Scoliosis was always my secret.  Something I never shared with ANYONE.  I didn't want to be different, I didn't want to complain.  If you knew me, you probably didn't ever know I had anything "wrong" with me.  I essentially suffered in silence.  You know, sometimes the pain would get so bad that the only way to relieve it would be to lay on a tennis ball.  I would roll on it with all of my body weight to get the pain out.  My husband doesn't even know this.  I NEVER complained.  So, like I was saying, the more I talk about it, the more I realize how many people this afflicts.  Even the guy sitting next to me at the sushi bar.  A couple of days ago, I was at the park, and Lyla (age 2) was repeatedly asking me to push her on the swing.  I kept telling her that I couldn't because of my back.  A lady overheard and gave me the 'Your back?  I want to know what's wrong with your back, but I'm not going to ask' look.  I divulged my surgery information to her, and next thing I know she's pushing Lyla and she's talking about her rib hump.  I was ecstatic!!

I have NO pain.  Not even just a little tiny bit that isn't even worth mentioning, no. I have NO pain! All of the pain I had prior to surgery is gone.  I can stand without pain, I can sit without pain, I can drive without pain, I can sleep without pain.  Those rods and screws are a part of me now, they belong in my body, and they are as apparent to me as my liver.  And who can feel their liver?  This is nothing short of a miracle, and borderline unheard of with this surgery.  I can go all day long without laying down and I can fully take care of my kids by myself.  I can even pitch a ball to Drew, and play soccer with him.  I follow the scoliosis forums closely, too closely maybe, and the amount of time that people suffer after this surgery is so disheartening to read about.   I think about them daily, and am so grateful for the outcome I have had and the magical hands of the surgeon that "fixed" me.   

One thing I have noticed since my surgery, and I don't really know what to accredit this to, but I feel its worth mentioning.  I have always been a type-A personality, and my blood pressure teeters on the high side because I am so high strung.  A normal blood pressure for me would be 125/75, but easily goes way up throughout the day due to outside stressors.  I would say the above mentioned blood pressure would have been my low.  Well, I have been checking my blood pressure almost daily now because I've noted that its new normal is 97/62.  Over and over again.  This has me so perplexed and intrigued.  Could this be due to my surgery or something else all together.  Dr. Marco, if you read this, enlighten me!!  Also note, that I am not taking anything for pain so its not narcotic induced.  Not that I even know if narcotics cause that to happen, but I imagine they do.  

One more tiny thing, which is really a big thing, I'm driving!  I've been driving.  I started driving on my 4 week post op day.  I am super independent and the not being able to get up and go was really getting to me.  I think that's part of the reason I ditched the pain pills so quickly too, well that and the fact that I enjoy being on planet earth.  On pain pills you kind of hover somewhere between here and the moon I'm convinced.

Tim, my husband, will be coming for a visit in a couple of weeks and we are so excited.  Its been really hard on my kids and me to be away from Daddy.  When Tim left I was only two weeks post op and was only just getting up and around.  He's going to be in shock when he arrives at 8 weeks post op.  I can't wait!!  

Still walking and working out, and managed to shed 10 minutes off of my walking 5k.  I walk a 5k in 45 minutes now, ok I lie, i was 46 minutes and some change, but close enough.  I'm pretty sure that's about as fast as it can possibly be done.  Don't believe me, I challenge you!

Untitled by alistephens at Garmin Connect - Details

Here is my 5k information.  Couldn't get it to post on the previous entry from some reason, but here is my proof! :)

Untitled by alistephens at Garmin Connect - Details

So, things didn't work out the way they were supposed to.  Thursday I go online to register myself for the 5k and there is a big notice that says that the location of the race has been changed to Houston.  This put a huge damper on things and I decided not to register.  First of all, the plan was to take the kids and my parents with me that morning to the original location, La Centerra, here in Katy and have them go to breakfast at Panera while I go on my walk.  After which they would join me at the finish line for photo op and whatnot.  Well, the new location was at a park.  A park with no shelter, and definitely no nice place to have breakfast.  that would have meant that I'd have to go all by myself, walk a 5k, and then have nothing, but a bib to show for it.  I wasn't about to take my kids out in the morning in the cold to sit out there for an hour.  So I was mad, and my plans were ruined.  That being said, I decided it doesn't matter.  Bottom line is I walked a 5k on my own at 25 days post op, and I am going to try and get the proof to upload to this.



I have reached my one month mark and could not be any more pleased.  I remember the day of surgery I kept thinking to myself, I wish I could fast forward this month.  Knowing that one month mark would be a turning point and I'd be able to do more.  I was never expecting that I'd be doing things at two weeks that I thought I'd be doing at a month and that I would be pretty close my totally normal world at one month.  Just this Saturday, I took the kids all by myself to the mall where we walked around and went to Bass Pro Shops to ride all the boats and off-road vehicles.  Then we went to the park where we walked around a lake looking at the catfish, played, and then enjoyed a picnic lunch together. In all, I had them out, by myself, for three hours that morning and we had such a good time.  It was nice to have them all to myself again for the first time in a while.  Lyla, age 2, got mad at me just once when I told her I could not pick her up and push her in the swing.  Other than that, my very independent babies did very well knowing my limitations.

I have also hit the gym again.  I couldn't wait any longer, and am back at it just about every day.  My parents have a gym in house so I don't have to go far.  I have been doing the elliptical for 30-40 minutes at a time.  I put the resistance way up and I don't use my arms, and so I don't put any stress at all on my healing back.  I have also been doing 3 pound weights with just a ton of repetition.  I can only do biceps and triceps at this time though because those are the only two muscles I can work in my arms without causing strain on my back muscles.  My back muscles just aren't ready for that yet. Then I do about a million squats with help from the wall and yoga ball.  So I alternate between a gym day and a walking day.

All pain is essentially gone, and there are times when I actually forget about my new back until I try to do something I can't do, like bend.  I am taking no pain medication now, not even tylenol, and I'm feeling great.  If I could have looked into the future and seen how well I'm doing post surgery, and I would have spent have the time I did worrying about this procedure.  Everything I read did nothing more than terrify me into believing this may quite possibly be the end of my normal life for me.  It was few and far between where I read something that was uplifting and reminded me that there is life after fusion.

This week,  I am going to put a series of videos showing how I do things day to day with adjustments because I can't bend or lift.  So check back.

4.5 miles at 25 days

Yesterday marked 25 days pot-op, and I celebrated by walking 4.5 miles.  These were just the miles that  were recorded on my trusty Garmin, and not the additional walking around the house I did, and the several errands I ran with my Dad.  I slept really well last night!!  Saturday I'll be walking my first 5k at 30 days post op.  I used to run before I had surgery, its something I truly enjoy doing.  Running clears the mind, and makes you realize what work is.  There is nothing more amazing than getting to that point in a workout where you feel like you're going to die, your heart is pounding, sweat dripping from every inch of your body, and I always get chills when I reach my breaking point.  Pushing your body to that level, and then feeling how quickly you can recover is an unbelievable thing to me, and something I so crave.  I'm not crazy, I just really like to feel my body working.  I kind of went off on a tangent there.  So, before I had surgery, I had been following a scoliosis forum for several months.  There was one lady on there that had a spinal fusion surgery, and at 33 days post op walked her first 5k.  I thought that was  so amazing, and gave me something to strive for.  It also encouraged me in knowing that there is life after fusion, and that I will be able to continue doing all the athletic things I so enjoy.  So, I'm one up-ing her by completing my first 5k walk at just 30 days post op.

Progress continues going really well.  I spend most of my day with my kids now, with minimal lay down breaks.  I can also sit in a car or couch quite comfortable again.  I still feel like I got hit by a car, and I'm wondering jut how long that sensation will last.  I can still only very gently put my hands on my waist or poke my ribs.  I feel like I have an all over torso bruise.  The steri-strips on my incision are still holding tight, and only the top two have fallen off thus far.  Dr. Marco said that they fall off at just the right time all on their own.  Can't wait for that!  There are times where my muscles feel so tight that I just want to get in a hot bath and soak for a while, but I can't until those strips fall off.  So I settle for nightly HOT showers which do wonders for relaxing the back.

Pain management is going really well, and I can go most all days without taking anything at all anymore.  Its still a requirement at night along with a muscle relaxer.  I've gotten to a point where I've become really aware of where the bottom of the rod on vertebra T12 and the unfused portion on L1 meet.  It isn't painful, just really annoying at times.  When I lay in bed and shuffle myself over to get comfortable it causes a really strange sensation.  The other night I just couldn't get comfortable and I kept feeling that rod in my back and it kind of made me feel a little bit of panic.  I felt taken over, uncomfortable, violated.  I really just wanted to rip the rod right out of my back.  There are times when I think about all that I have screwed into my back and I think it's really neat, and I feel so hardcore.  Then there are times when I think about what was done and what I have back there and it bothers me, and I want the intruder out of my body.  Strange, huh?

I got to partake in three really fun things with my kids this last week.  These events I had crossed off my calendar as being able to do so soon after surgery.  First, last Friday, the kids school had a Halloween Party. Each room had a fun little game they could play and earn candy, and the cafeteria was full of yummy food to choose from.  It was so much fun to see all the little kids dressed up.  there were a ton of people and it was quite crowded in some areas.  Crowded places make me a little nervous because I don't want anyone to bump into me.

Fishing for treats with Lyla.  She had to be a Princess and a Ballerina.  So we merged the two.

Decorating cookies 

Then, Saturday morning was Howl-o-ween event at La Centerra which is a really nice outside shopping area in Katy, TX.  Everyone dressed up their dogs and there was even a one mile walk that took place for anyone who wanted to participate.  Lyla jogged the first half mile without stopping as she was chasing a giant man in a dog suit riding in a truck leading the walk.  Drew was really unsure of that giant dog and spent most of the time yelling "Bring me back my sister!"  It was quite funny.

I know, so strange, who posts a picture from behind?? But do you see how straight I am?  I never  looked like that before.

Finally, we got to go trick-or-treating last night and the kids and I had a fabulous time.  They didn't get scared at all, and had such a good time collecting massive amounts of candy.  

Don't they look happy. Buzz Lightyear sans wings

Getting ready to head out